


There's nothing subtle here

by koashi



Series: I'm trying not to give into you [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Adam is still dead sorry, Enemies to Friends, Galaxy Garrison, Galra Keith (Voltron), Low-key, M/M, One Shot Collection, One-Sided Attraction, Pining James Griffin (Voltron), Pining Keith (Voltron), Pining Shiro (Voltron), Possessive Shiro (Voltron), Snapshots, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love, Wordcount: 5.000-10.000, Written after season 7 release, crack-ship gone rarepair ship, friends to strangers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-14
Updated: 2018-08-14
Packaged: 2019-06-27 12:33:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15685521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/koashi/pseuds/koashi
Summary: Do you still have a crush on him?If you asked James a year ago, he would have said no. That he’s over it. Keith is gone in space and he won’t be here by the time he gets back. Now he’s not so sure. What he thought had healed hasn’t at all. Only a pale reminder that he never got over him in the first place. Keith anchored himself into his life and never left even after his betrayal.James covers his face with his hand, letting out a groan and nods.(Can be read as a stand alone, but there is a part 1 to this)





	There's nothing subtle here

To be fair he hasn't seen Keith in over five years. His memories are nestled deep within his head. Buried under layers of panic and distress with their fight against the Galra. With his duty to protect the last stronghold of Earth he hasn’t had time to relax. Using pieces of those memories are what keeps him together even after nights and days of battles when he doesn’t know when will be his last.

When he sees figures covered in white armor, each color-coded and moving as a unit. He only thinks, _this is it this is our last hope._ One breath and each of them knows exactly what the other will do. Fluidity that James hasn’t seen beyond flying the MFE. A step behind as one of them shoots the Garla drones. Another easily overtaking and covering the others to keep themselves from being overwhelmed. He’s almost jealous at how easily their weapons take out the drones and androids.

James breaks between the battle when the one with the red armor prepares to take down a drone. Ready to pounce on top of a broke down car to get the altitude he needs.

“I had it,” the red-armored figure growls out turning towards the direction of the blast. The sword rests heavy in the figures hand the hold only loosening once he sees his team in the similar white and orange color scheme of the Garrison.

 _Keith_. His eyes register an all too familiar face, while his head plays up that he looks different. Older, bigger, taller, than the last time he saw him. James wants more time to take his past crush, but now isn’t the time his war torn brain supplies.

“Drones send distress signals when attacked,” he lowers his gun and jerks his head toward the Garrison truck, “Our weapons neutralize the signal, so unless you wanna deal with a swarm of those things, let us handle it, now let's get out of here before more show up.”

He pinpoints the moment Keith’s eyebrows furrow almost wanting to challenge the way James speaks to him, but for the moment there’s no recognition in his eyes. He’s a good distance away and by luck he doesn’t get to room with Keith in the same Garrison car, but with Commander Shirogane, the pink-armored paladin, the strange alien man with pointed ears and the blonde alien as well.

In all honesty, James is grateful. He doesn’t know what to say or what to do once he’s able to talk to Keith one on one. The dull pain in his chest aches and James wants to cry. He thought he was over it. Over the stupid crush, over the way Keith looks so much more prettier than the last time he saw him which was him as a young teen. On the ride back Shirogane gives him a quick look over,

“Griffin?” The question is heavy in the air, a part of him wishes that he wasn’t the one stuck driving, there isn’t anywhere he can run. Shiro’s the only one with any familiarity compared to the aliens surrounding him.

“Yes, Sir.” A bundle of courage keeps his voice steady. A quick glance back to Shiro is all he needs, confirmation.

He’s changed just along with Keith. Hair is a pale white, there are small bags under his eyes and a tension in his shoulder that won’t go away. He looks older, tired, probably done with his fair share of war and what horrors he saw up in space. James can only imagine how much worse the Galra forces have done in 10,000 years beyond Earth’s own solar system. Earth has only seen a piece of it.

There’s something in Shiro’s eyes he can’t quite put together and the brunet thinks this is normal. The brunet never got to know Shiro when he was at the Garrison. Nothing beyond than Shiro being a Commanding Officer. A mentor figure to Keith, he lies. He knows that Keith saw him as something else. Something so much more than just a figure lending him a hand.

The memories are boiling to the surface and  James already wants to forget what happened six years ago. It’s a scar that never healed the right way after.

James is glad when the team finally arrives back to the base. It cuts whatever else Shirogane wanted to say short and gives the pilot a moment to breath again. All of them in awe in the small tract of land that is the Garrison’s base. Earth’s last stand.

He pulls to a stop as soon as Rizavi does. The Garrison doors hiss open and he sees a few of them jump out to embrace their families. James holds back a smile. A part of him happy that for their families, they finally some closure.

He slips out and leans his weight against the vehicle. Crossing his arms as he watches the rest of the Paladins talk animatedly to one another, to their families and Garrison officers. His eyes only truly follow one person however, Keith.

He stands close to Shiro for a moment for leaning down to pet the strange space dog who leans into his touch. The creature moves forward and licking his face making the Paladin laugh as he tries to pull away. There’s a scar on his face that James didn’t notice the first time. Without the helmet it becomes all the more visible. It’s a pale pink ,running from the middle of his cheek down to his neck. It looks recent and for some reason his eyes fall onto Shiro’s scar as well. _Ironic_ , is all he thinks.

Iverson says something to Keith, who responds by giving the older man a salute, standing up and away from his dog.

The brunet feels like he must have been staring for too long and too intensely as Keith suddenly turns and makes eye contact with him. James bites his lip and reaches up to pull his own helmet off, there’s a spark in Keith’s eyes. He looks like he wants to say something finally seeing James after who knows how long.

His body moves before he knows what he’s doing. He walks away. Better yet run away. He can’t deal with this right now. His mind is just as lost and confused as it was that night in his dorm room five years ago.

Two steps forward, four steps back.

* * *

 James wants to whole heartedly ignore everything that happens from the moment Keith and his team set foot onto the base. He has own team to worry about as leader of the MFE fighters.

On his way to the debriefing his passes the Garrison’s Remembrance Wall. A wall littered with plaques of names of fallen soldiers who have passed within the last four years with the Galra. There is Iverson and Shiro. By the look that Shiro gives, face pained. Eyes shut tightly and his hand reaches up and covers his face. Words that fall from his lips before he crumbles to his feet is that he found Adam’s name among the many. It’s a personal moment that James feels he’s interrupted, something that he shouldn’t have seen. He picks up his pace and leaves.

During his time alive, James was trained by Adam. Taken quickly under his wing right after the Garrison started their plans to prepare for the Galra. He was a mentor that James won’t ever forget. Teaching him how to fly and push himself even further within the months they prepared with alien-human integrated technology. At the time James found it ironic that out of all the people he got paired with it was none other than Shiro’s boyfriend. Only once did the brunet have the guts to bring him up.

“How do you feel about Commander Shirogane fighting up in space,” they were in the middle of getting into their flight suits, preparing for a mock battle.

The darker skin man stopped, hands pulling at the zipper as his eyes falling to the floor. “Takashi made his decision. As much as I would have wanted him here, he made his choice.”

The other’s mood sours as he finishes up quickly, slipping the helmet on and over his head.

“Please don't bring him up again.” The look that he gives James isn’t one of anger or frustration. He’s gotten well at reading his mentor. Sadness swirls in his eyes, devastation.

“Yes, Sir.” Is all he manages to say.

James heard rumors that the famous couple had a falling out over the Kerberos mission. What for? James never found the answer to, but whatever it was Adam regretted it.

He sees Keith again when he slips into the debriefing room. The next steps to figure out their plan of attack with Voltron so close.

The Paladins and their alien companions all are on the other side of the table. Each in a standard Garrison cadet uniform minus Shiro who is now back in the commanding officer that Iverson and the others wear. A look all to familiar to most of them even if in James opinion is strange. They almost feel human again to James after hearing all the stories from Commander Holt. Voltron seems like a God, with no qualms to its own power it holds.

His team stands opposite to the paladins. Each in position, arms behind their back as they stare forward. Ears intent on listening to everything. As the debriefing goes, the yellow paladin, Hunk James remembers starts to go off.

Listing on why the Garrison isn’t doing more. That there are families out there that right now the Garrison can do anything about. Families trapped under Galran control forced to work in slave camps. It hits too close to home as James is reminded his own family is out there. His family is stuck in that same situation and the brunet can’t do anything about it.

“Hey, do paladins not understand the chain of command?” James growls out, stepping forward. Staring at Hunk.”Your CO said it is too dangerous.”

Keith reacts almost immediately, eyes snapping to James as they give him a nasty glare. _James has no right._ It’s clear that what Keith is saying. The Paladins don’t follow Garrison command. If anything flies for the Paladin’s it has to past Keith’s authority first and thus mutually the rest of the team’s. For a second he sees Keith open his mouth as if to respond to his comment but stops. Shiro is gripping his wrist on the table which does enough to pull Keith from saying anything. They share a look before Keith pats Hunk’s shoulder, squeezing it as Hunk leans into his touch.

James leaves the debriefing bitter.

* * *

 “Do you know that Keith dude?” Kinkade says as soon as he enters their living quarters.

James effectively rolls over and buries the pillow into his face. The pilot made his escape after the debrief ended. Kinkade knows him too well, he knows his all not-to-good hiding spots. Their room.

“Don’t wanna talk about it.” The brunet huffs out, muffled by the pillow case.

Kinkade sets down on the edge of his bed and removes the pillow from his grasp. Leaving his face open and easy to read. The pilot sets his hands on his stomach and looks up to the top of the bunk beds instead. Glaring into the material in hopes that the other would just leave him alone.

“You’re easy to read, come on, you’re the leader, something bothers you it’s going to affect everyone.” He lays a hand on James’ knee and squeezes.

Finally James looks over. Kinkade gives him a smile. He’s not the most expressive guy he knows, but it offers some comfort.

Kinkade doesn’t know Keith just like the rest of the team. They all transferred in once preparations to face the Galra started. Each coming from different Garrison schools across the states. Each their own ace pilot from their respective schools. They don’t know Shiro the way the Garrison knows him here. They don’t know Keith the way the Garrison treated him as the second coming of a great pilot behind Shiro. If Keith wasn’t a Paladin the brunet knows that his position as a MFE fighter pilot would be gone.

In the momentary battle of telling him or not, he loses. James decides to tell him, he starts from middle school to when he became a cadet at the Garrison, to the months of learning about Keith, becoming his friend to eventually having a crush on him and ultimately losing him to someone else.

Kinkade listens to him rant with such sincerity, James is grateful. After the past few years with his team he’s gotten used to them in a way he never thought he would have. A second family in the sky.

“That sucks. Do you still…” he trails off, leaving the question in the air.

_Do you still have a crush on him?_

If you asked James a year ago, he would have said no. That he’s over it. Keith is gone in space and he won’t be here by the time he gets back. Now he’s not so sure. What he thought had healed hasn’t at all. Only a pale reminder that he never got over him in the first place. Keith anchored himself into his life and never left even after his betrayal.

James covers his face with his hand, letting out a groan and nods.

Nothing Kinkade does can help ease the pain that flares with his confession.

* * *

 He should have said no instead of: “That’s why we’re coming with you.”

Once he sees the pair of red and orange trying to sneak out. He knows he has to intervene, right now the Paladin’s are their own hope to winning the battle against the Galra. A part of him says that he’s doing it to keep their own chance of surviving up, but James keeps playing himself. It’s an excuse. He knows he’s only doing it because he still feels something for Keith even after everything James still wants something between him and Keith. He should know better, but he doesn’t.

He’s a fool. An absolute fool.

* * *

 James is stuck driving again. They’re infiltrating one of the Galra buildings. They need information on what exactly they’re building. The brunet is anxious, it’s the first time the Garrison allowed for something this risky. The general plan the Garrison has maintained since the invasion only attack back when he needs to. This isn’t a war they couldn’t win with by overpowering the Galra, it’s a stalemate of who could last longer. James grips the steering wheel a little tighter as he turns right avoiding the debris from buildings and broke down cars.

He sighs, he doesn’t have the best of luck either. This time he’s actually stuck with Keith. Who’s taken the back seat while his wolf sticks his head in between the two front seats. The creature eyes him, turning his muzzle towards James and tries to lick him. The tongue is warm and unexpected, causing his shoulder to rise up in attempt to stop him.

“Kogane can you keep your dog under control?” He pulls away trying to keep his distance which only urges the dog to lean more to get his attention.

“He’s just trying to greet you,” Keith says and does absolutely nothing to help. Of course. Keith is still the same old Keith.

“I’m trying not to crash can you tell him to stop.” The wheel jerks to the left and he hits a snag in the road causing the vehicle to jump.

Only then Keith decides that maybe crashing the goddamn car isn’t part of the plan. He prys the wolf back, who in turn gives him a look of ‘ _Why did you stop me?’_

“Bad, Wolf.” he chastes, with a quick glance he sees Keith point at the wolf. Tapping his nose lightly who simply stares at his finger.

James almost cries with how cute it sounds and looks. Through will power alone he pushes and pulls his feelings down. Deep, deep down and he prays it doesn’t pop up for the rest of the mission.

He learns that the weird wolf-dog thing is a cosmic wolf that can teleport. Maybe it’s not that bad after all? He’ll have to give it a try when Keith’s not looking.

* * *

 They’re officially on their last stand.

After their last mission they found out that those gigantic Galra structures are housing a _Zaiforge Canons_. An planet killing super gun that spells out death for earth if even two of those things fire. James thought it could be worse and is sorefully proven wrong when he’s assigned to take Keith to this check point.

The universe has it out for him.

Keith makes no comment during the debriefing and James takes that as a sign that maybe the other has forgot everything that happened in his dorm. James is forever hung up on the day his crush officially broke his heart. A guy could still be bitter, though Rizavi might say he’s being petty.

Again he wants to make a quick escape and make it to this room before the big mission, to maybe let himself get a moment of rest from Keith’s piercing gaze that hasn’t weakened at all from being away from Earth.

He’s wrong. As always anything involving Keith, it never goes his way.

“James,” Keith says when the CO dismisses them.

It’s in front of everyone. Out in the open to where James can’t say no without looking like an asshole. Both teams stop and take in what is happening in front of them. Interested in what both leaders need to say.

“Can I talk to you? In private.” It’s loud and direct to everyone in the room to get a move on and leave. The Paladins share a look among them before shrugging and continuing on their way.

Kinkade is the only one that looks at James and asks him: “You okay?”

“Yeah...yeah I’ll be fine.” He lies. It’s a tell. Too easy for Kinkade and Rizavi who are still in the room to tell that he is. They respect it and move on as well.

The last one to leave is Shiro, who’s pulled Keith aside to squeeze both of his wrists. The new metallic hovering arm is still strange to see. Intimacy, his brain supplies. Something has changed, Keith still gives Shiro the goddamn moon if he had to, but for Shiro the way he looks at him, something has shifted. They’re murmuring to one another, Shiro’s look is all too familiar to James. Like the time on the roof. He’s weary of James and what he might do. But Shiro doesn’t know him. He doesn’t know the way James has changed, he’s not the same person he was years ago and he’s sour that Shiro still assumes badly of him.

He lets out a sigh, Shiro passes him and James holds nothing back, giving him a glare. Shiro does the same and the door behind him hisses close.

“You’ve been avoiding me.” Keith says, he hasn’t moved from the other side of the room.

“Have I?” He plays stupid, he has no excuse and he doesn’t know how this might go. The cards are in Keith’s hands and James doesn’t know what he’ll do.

“I know…we left on the wrong foot-” Keith begins, the brunet cuts him off.

“You disappeared into space, there’s no wrong foot, there’s nothing here to begin with Keith.” James sighs, running his hand through his hair. “I’ve been busy, I have duties here, sorry that I’m not fawning over you like I was when we were both cadets.”

No, no, no. It’s not what he wants to say. It’s anything but that he wants to say to Keith. He wanted to say he missed him. That a part of him worried everyday since he’s been gone. That he still has feelings for him and he’s fine that they’re not returned, he just wants to mean something to Keith. Not in the way Shiro is Keith’s everything, but close enough. To be a friend. He’s so desperate for anything at this point. His heart and his mouth are in a disagreement.

The reaction from Keith _hurts_. He takes a step back, eyebrows furrowed not expecting James’ reaction. How things of changed, James laughs to himself. With his body language he closes off, arms crossed, eyes down and away. Same old Keith. The tables have turned and James’ is the one going out of his way to be cold.

Keith opens his mouth to say something but seems to stop himself and he lets out a sigh. The brunet is surprised with that. The Keith he knew would have snapped back, he wouldn’t take something like that lying down. James hasn’t been the only one who’s matured and grown with time.

“I wanted to talk to you, but I guess it’s not worth it.” There’s a moment Keith closes his eyes and centers himself, “Just be ready for departure.”

The olive branch Keith handed out to him was slapped to the side.

* * *

 This time he’s met by Leifsdottir, the last person he would have thought to be waiting for him. He keeps walking and Leifsdottir flanks him.

“You overheard everything I’m assuming...shouldn’t you know that it’s not nice to spy on people's private conversations?” He gives her a glance, Leifsdottir purses her lips and continues forward her hands behind her back.

“The paladins are a factor that I can’t quite calculate,” she says and picks up her pace to walk in front of James.

“The black paladin seems to be the one that cause you the most pain...maybe--” James nips the bud of her sentence there.

“Leifsdottir, please I don’t need this right now.” He wants time to think, to be alone.

“Negative, Griffin.”

“Can’t you follow my orders?”

“I’m doing this as a friend, James’,” there’s a softness to her voice that stops him.

“Let’s go get some substance, there’s a 99.9% the other’s are waiting.” The sincerity in her voice catches him off guard.  

“Not 100%?”

“There are no absolutes in probabilities.”

It makes James laugh at her honesty.

* * *

 It’s awkward.

Keith hasn’t said anything or even looked James’ way since what happened. James feels bad, that he shouldn’t have said anything and probably heard Keith out. Maybe he’ll get the courage on the way there, it is a fair distance away even with the improved speed of the MFE’s. He straps himself in and goes into his routine checks.

The paladin is a quiet, heavy presence behind him.

“Dynotherms connected. Mega-thruster are go.” In the coms the rest of Griffin’s team reports the same.

The particle barrier breaks for a moment and James’ rushes through the opening. The team splits with an echo of the fighter's thrusts and head towards their locations.

He doesn’t know where to start with Keith, what to say, or what to do. Apologize, maybe? He’ll go with that, it’s a start.

“I..I’m sorry.” James says, he’s shut off his coms to not broadcast the entire conversation to his team.

Keith ignores him. James knows fully well that he heard him, guess that the other is more upset than he thought. James wants to push, make the other talk and give him attention, but he knows that will have the opposite effect of what he wants. A moment of clarity and finally sort everything between them.

Minutes pass and finally Keith says something, “We’ll talk about this later.”

There’s no need to say anything back.

“Reaching the drop-off point,” he switches back his coms and reports. “Now is time to start calling your lion.”

Keith says nothing, more than likely pulling his concentration to calling his ship. Seconds pass, the drop-off point only is getting closer and closer.

Something rumbles and his ship shakes in the air. His ship doesn’t register anything until it’s right on top of them. For a second he thinks it’s a Galra fleet wholefully prepared for their surprised attack, but he hears Keith huff and mumble into the comms.

“There she is.” Not once in James’ life he would think robotic lions would have genders, but each their own he guesses.

He lets the plane go on auto as he takes in the view. The black lion is huge. Yellow eyes gleam with attention as it flies right next to the MFE. The fighter is barely the size of it’s head, the black material shines and James’ makes out scratches and dents in the metal. Even the lions have see its fair share of battles. Another rumble almost a purr comes from the Black Lion.

“Wow,” he whispers.

“Yeah, that was my first reaction to seeing the Lions too.” Then Keith starts to stands, removing the protective belt along with hitting a few buttons to allow the windshield to lower. James does nothing as he stares at Keith. The sun hits him at just the right moment. Keith’s body is outlined by the suns rays, leaving his body a silhouette to the clear sky behind him. Saved for the figure of the Black Lion as she waits for her Paladin. It’s beautiful, a scene out of some cheesy romance novel, if only his hair was out and twisting with the oceanic winds, he’s sure that it would have been perfect.

“Good luck.” Keith breaks the silence before throwing himself out of the cockpit. The sound gets caught in James’ throat.

The jetpack shoots up and almost in slow motion the lions jaws close around Keith, swallowing him. The lion’s eyes gleam, brighter and a sound echos in his head.

_I will keep him safe._

“Black Paladin successfully dropped. Heading to rendezvous point,” James broadcasts, snapping himself out of his stupidor.

What was that? A voice? He grips his controls and twirls the fighter plane in the opposite direction, watching the figure of the black lion grow smaller and smaller a shiver runs up his spine.

A sentient being that’s over ten-thousand years old just spoke to him. James feels like an infant compared to the powerful lion.

* * *

 The next time he sees Keith is when his lion is crash landing into the Garrison base. The silence from the open communication lines is deafening as Shiro repeatedly asks for any of them to respond. His voice laced with worry as nothing but static are the paladin's response.

Shiro tries again he's only met with more silence. A fear climbs up James’ spine.

“MFE’s deploy and check up on those lions.”

“Roger.” The four of them set off into their fighters.

“Leave the black lion to Atlas, the rest of you choose a lion and go.” The strain in Captain Shirogane’s voice urges them to push the MFE’s forward.

“Kinkade take the yellow, Leifsdottir, blue, Rizavi, green, and I’ll take red.” James issues out.

The MFE’s take off in urgency. He has no idea how the Paladin’s states, if they’re alive or possibly dead.

James passes the black lion on his way to the red one. The state of the lions fears for their Paladin’s. There are smears of black and damaged metal as its opened components spark with energy. There’s a faint protective shield that flickers in and out of existence. The lions with the last of its energy is frantic with protecting their Paladins.

He lands the MFE fighter a distance away from the red lion. The frame buried in dirt and rock from it's crash landing. The eyes of the lion flickers for a moment and a rumble escapes its mouth. The sound echos in the back of James' head. A threat. Even with the little energy the lion has it can’t tell the state of the world around them. The certainty of whether they won or lost the battle is unknown to the sentient beings.

“I’m just here to help.” James says in hopes that the lion will open up.

The lion seems to get it, eyes again flicker this time in understanding. With the last of its strength the jaws open allowing entrance.

James picks up his pace and gets in. Luckily there’s only a simple hall from the mouth to the cockpit.

He finds Lance there. His figure slumped in the pilot chair, hands still faintly gripping the lion’s controls. There’s a faint smell of burnt in the air, James slowly approaches still not completely sure of Lance’s state.

To put it simply. It’s bad. His helmet is gone and there’s a nasty bruise on the side of his cheek. There are deep bags under his eyes. His armor is busted, with chuff marks and tears. The spandex like material is torn around his hand and some torns aline with the sides of his stomach. He looks exhausted, his breathing is labored and his eyes open only for a moment before flickering back to a close. He can’t move him not like this, he can’t tell the extension of his injuries.

“Griffin reporting. Red Paladin is injured, he requires immediate medical attention.”

The other’s echo the same reports. Each Paladin is gravely injured and require attention.

There’s a heavy air in the com units, waiting for further orders.

“We’re sending medic help to each location. MFE you can return to base.” Captain Shirogane’s voice breaks through the silence.

When he lands again in the destruction of the Garrison base he sees a group of medical officers race off with someone on a stretcher. He only manages to see a part of Keith among the officers. There’s blood. Lots of blood. It covers his face as his paladin helmet is still in place. The clear glassy material is shattered, there are bags under his eyes again exhaustion just like the red paladin.

The rest of the Paladins arrive in a similar state, each rolled in on a stretcher with unknown injuries and unknown fates.

* * *

 The base is relieved when the medics announce that each Paladin is okay. Each gained a number of injuries, but it’s nothing they can’t recover from.

It doesn’t answer why none of them wake up for months.

Their records indicate everything is fine, that there are no issues or head injuries minus the Black Paladin, Keith.

They’re in a debrief when Shiro seems to connect the dots on why they aren’t waking up. Each of their families are worried.

“I think it might have to do with their quintessance. There’s no way to measure it, but I’m sure after that last battle it took a lot more than what the Paladin’s bodies are used to. This energy they posses fuels the lions, that’s why they haven’t reacted in the months ether.”

The brunet nods in some understand. Quintessance is still a rocky subject that no one can explain properly. It’s a life energy, but cosmic energy? There’s no definite answer to what it is, but it’s applications are limitless he’s heard Commander Holt explain millions of times while developing the Garrison weapons.

“There’s no real way to replace the quintessance of a person, this all happens naturally, I’m sorry, there’s nothing else we can do for them but let them rest.” The alien Coran says. He must be worried as well. Worried about Princess Allura and when she will wake up. It’s written all over his face just like most of the other families. A proper night's rest hasn't come with their worrying.

The meeting is dismissed and James has the urge to go visit Keith. A part of him is torn. He has no right to go, he shouldn’t he’s falling into his own traps and he’s only going to hurt himself further. Another part of him tells him that it’s only a visit, what harm could it possibly do?

His body leads him to the medical ward before he can ultimately decide whether or not to see Keith. Since he’s already here he might as well. The door opens and he sees how serne Keith is sleeping.The light from the sunset make his room glow orange, highlighting his features. The bags under his eyes still there a light gray against pale white skin. The blood gone along with the bleeding as the medics have tightly wrapped a medical bandage around his head. There are wrappings all along his arms, more than likely littered with bruises and cuts from his battle. His duty as Defender of the Universe has left him like this.

It’s scary once James truly thinks of it. The Paladins are shadows to what the Lions mean to the universe. The true symbol of Peace are nothing more than junks of metal without their Paladins. He grabs one of the chairs and pulls it up to the side of the bed. Keith hasn’t moved beyond his breathing.

There are no barriers here. No walls for James to hold up, nothing to hold back. He’s weak and reaches out to Keith’s hand, stopping short for a moment. He doesn’t have the right. Keith doesn’t want him like this, but he does it anyway.

He reaches out and intertwines his fingers with the other. Keith’s hands slot so perfectly into James he runs his thumb over the back of his hand. They’re warm, he half expected them to be cold. It’s nice. The skin smooth to his touch.

James eases his arms onto the bed, the tension in his back and shoulders disappear. It’s the first time he’s been calm since the final battle of Galra. His eyelids feel heavy. He tries to blink away the sleepiness, it does nothing. He grips Keith’s hand a little tighter.

He falls into a peaceful sleep.

* * *

 The pilot only wakes up once he hears the faint sound of the door of the medical room hisses. The room is dark, the sunset is gone and replaced by the night sky. Without all the lights from the city, James makes out all the constellation he can see from the small Garrison window. The brunet wonders the time. His hand still grips onto Keith’s, again he runs his thumb over the back of his hand.

“Oh...I didn’t think anybody else would be here.” An all to familiar voice breaks through the darkness.

James jerks his hand away from Keith, he feels exposed, caught like a deer in headlights.

It’s Shiro. His hand settles onto the light switch and they flicker on. James’ word’s get caught in his throat. He doesn’t have an excuse. The pilot should have known better that Shiro would appear. Keith and him are practically attached to the hip, that hasn’t changed. There’s a nagging feeling in the back of his head that there might be more, more on Shiro’s side that wasn’t there before. Something Keith hasn’t noticed.

“You’re...here to visit Keith?” Shiro states, his eyes on Keith’s hand.

The brunet’s ears ring. He knows. He knows. “Yeah,” he sputters out.

“That’s kind of you,” the Captain says suspiciously, a quick looks shows that he knows James is lying. There’s more to it that he’s letting on.

Stuffing his hands into his lap he avoids any eye contact, settling to stare into Keith’s blanket.

“I visit him after I finish my duties for the day, it is late, but he doesn’t have anyone here for him. We’re still waiting for Krolia, his mother, to arrive with the resistance.”

The entire thing speaks volumes to James. There’s no need for Shiro to be here. He's doing it out of love. He’s here in steed of family.Something has changed, the look Shiro gives Keith is different to the last time he was on Earth. There’s a lot of something in those pair of grey eyes as they settle on Keith’s figure. The taller male reaches over James to brush a few strands of Keith’s hair out of the way.

“Has he had any changes?” Shiro asks

“Uh...no nothing’s happen since I’ve been here.” James responds with, even with him being sleep he knows the other has only keep sleeping as well.

The white-haired man hums in agreement. “Do you have feelings for Keith? I...I saw the way you were holding his hand when I came in.”

 _Is he an open book to everyone around him?_ James stiffles a groan.

He doesn’t dignify Shiro with a response.

And that’s all the response Shiro needs.

It’s almost possesive the way Shiro’s hand lands on top of Keith’s right after. Encompassing his hand with his as it cover Keith’s completely. He doesn’t make any eye contact with James either. It’s feels like a sign from Shiro, that he doesn’t belong here.

Maybe he doesn’t.

James excuses himself, pushing the chair away as he stands.

“I’m going to turn in for the night.” Shiro turns then to give him a smile and nod.

“Goodnight, cadet.”

He takes one last look at Keith before he leaves. Shiro takes his place and the image looks right. James has no right to be here. He doesn’t fit into this picture not the way Shiro does. A part of him fights against it. He has all the right to be here by Keith’s side. James fits here as much as Shiro. He doesn’t have to give into that, his feelings for Keith are valid too.

James stays away from Keith for the following weeks.

* * *

 There are suddenly a lot more aliens on Earth than James would like. There are the Olkirans, the Bi Boh’s (which look like strange noodle people), among other species, and the blades. Who all are Galra. James doesn’t know how to feel about that. Didn’t they just finish fighting the Galra? 

Shiro pays no mind as he heads up to a pair, reaching and shaking forearms. Okay, that’s different. Might be a Galra thing he guesses. Each of them have their mask disappear and greet the Captain with smiles. One of them looks too much like Keith. By the shape of her face and shade of her eye color. They’re just similar details that can mean anything.

“Where’s the kit?” The male Galra asks, his face screwed with concerned.

“Keith is...it’s better that you go see him yourself.” Shiro responds with, dropping his handshake with the other.

The female Galra blinks, confused. “Is he alright?”

Shiro nods, but lets out a sigh, “It will be easier to explain once we see him.”

The three of them leave and James sets off for his perimeter check.

* * *

 He’s only in the medical ward to get his monthly medcheck. Driving in the MFE’s at such high speeds one never knows what kind of effects it might have on all the pilot’s bodies. His team are the only ones with experience to fly them, the Garrison doesn't want to risk anything with losing them for stupid reason such as a dumb air sickness.

Something in the back of his head tells him to go check on Keith. He shouldn’t. James is on his road to crush recovery without Keith around, if he just goes back now it’s going to ruin all of his efforts.

Maybe he should have been paying more attention while walking in a medical ward after an Alien war, but he finds himself hitting something large and stiff as he rounds the corner. Smashing into something he feels his balance tip and he’s falling back, unexpectedly what ever he ran into. In the moment he braced himself for the impact, the pain, but nothing comes, the person reacting much faster than he could even process what's happening. Large hands grip his arms and they're pulling him straight back into a stand.

He blinks, “Thank you.”

“You much watch where you’re going.” Oh. Galra. Purple and tall. The figure is easily another foot and a half taller then him, that definitely ups the intimidation factor. Looming over his figure she explains how he must be weary in the medical ward for the sick.

The figure stops short, analyzing James. It’s the same Galra that Shiro met on the Garrison landing pad. The one that looks too much like Keith to be a coincidence.

“Oh...you are James, correct?” She says, running her glowing yellow eyes over him.   

“Uh...yes, how do you-”

“Keith has told me about you, come. I’m sure your presence will help in his healing.” He’s promptly dragged away from the exit doors and back deep into the the ward.

“UM, lady I don’t know you.” James says in hopes of having her stop her kidnapping.

“Krolia, Keith’s mother.” Oh. Shiro mentioned her before, but he never really expected an alien.

The brunet's brain short-circuits for a moment. If Krolia is Galra, then that makes Keith part Galra too? Well that explains a lot. He’s far to aggressive for a normal person and the scar on his face all to reminiscent of Krolia’s own facial markings. By the way her hair looks like the nasty rat tail, he’s certified that they are indeed related. He takes a moment to take the rest of her in. There’s a beauty to Krolia that he doesn’t see in other Galra, but it might just be his crush talking. 

He’s effectively dropped into the chair that’s next to Keith’s bed as Krolia settles onto the edge of the mattress on the other side. James can’t seem to win. Just once he thinks he’s done, the universe has something ready to pull him straight back. He sighs and slumps into the chair. The brunet's vision shifts over to the Galra. Krolia is holding one of Keith’s hands in hers. They easily swaddles his too large compared to Keith's small human hands, but through them James can see the rubbing motion she makes with her hands. The thumb running circles over the back and at the palm of Keith's hand.

She catches him staring and smiles. It’s warm and mother-like, catching James off guard with how human Krolia acts.“It’s an old Galran ritual. Healing. It’s passes one’s quintessance to another. It’s small, not in the way Alteans are able to control quintessance or the druids, but it helps.”

“Can anyone do it?” he asks. His hands twitches, telling him to do what she’s doing that she's practically giving him permission.

“Typically it’s done by one’s family, close friends. However, Kolivan is much too busy and Shiro as well. His friends are all in similar states, so I’m left alone to do this.”  Her voice grows quieter as she continues her healing.

The way she looks at Keith with so much sadness and worry makes her just like every other family couped up at the Garrison waiting for further news regarding whether the Paladins will wake soon or not. Slowly, he reaches over rubbing his thumb on the back of Keith’s hand. Maybe this is just one of those things that parents just say, like how if you pull a white hair out two more will grow back. Do the Galra have things like that?

Krolia seems grateful when he starts his ‘healing,’ sending him another smile, “In Galran it’s called _vesh_.”

“Is that just Galran for healing?” James asks, scrunching his nose. It’s interesting, different to humans who pray in times of healings.

“It means home, to bring one back home.”  It’s oddly beautiful, James thinks. A military driven species such as the Galra have such soft aspiration to simply bring someone they care about back home.

“Humans just pray,” he shrugs, “we don’t have anything fancy like _vesh_ to help.”

“You, humans, are quite primitive compared to the rest of the galaxies, you still have much to learn from other plants and its people.” It doesn’t sound like an insult at least.

The two of the enjoy the silence, running his thumbs in circles seems to help James’ own anxiety in the recent days. After what feels like hours Krolia stops, gently resting Keith’s hand back down onto the bed away from her lap.

“Thank you. He looks much better than yesterday, that’s for sure.” James looks over to Keith the bags under his eyes are gone and the hollowness in his cheeks are too maybe that's what Krolia is referring to.

“How do you...why did Keith mention me?” he can’t seem to piece his thoughts together after letting go of Keith’s hands.

“He mentioned you in passing, when he starts talking about feelings both you and Shiro get mentioned a lot.” She turns her head toward the window, watching the afternoon sky.

“Sorry to pull you away from your duties...It’s was nice meeting you James, you are a stronger warrior.” It’s a silent dismissal. Yet, James doesn’t mind, the way Krolia treats him is like a breath of fresh air. There’s nothing for him to uphold in this room with her. Through her glowing eyes and mother-like nature, she must know. Know about James and Keith, she doesn’t push or talk about it.

“It’s fine, I had no other duties today,” he says. Krolia turns and gives her attention.

“Would you like to learn more?”

James stares and nods, it’s not everyday you learn an alien language. Krolia smiles again. The two of them only get interrupted when the male Galra, Kolivan returns later that afternoon. He takes Krolia’s spot on the bed and begins _vesh_ , again. The brunet takes it as a sign to go, Krolia gives him a wave and Kolivan a hefty nod.

Maybe the Galra aren’t that bad after all.

* * *

 There’s been a mutual air between both Shiro and James that it’s better to avoid one another. Just by frequent passings and debriefings they can’t get along without shooting a glare to one another. James doesn’t know what he did wrong to get on Shiro’s bad side, but he won’t take it lying down.

Unfortunately, today he has to give the Captain a report on the MFE fighters and all their statuses. New cadets in-training as they start their building more of the fighters.

He stops right outside of Captain Shirogane’s office, gripping the holotablet a little tighter before he knocks.

“Come in.” The voice loud enough to pass through the thick material of the door, it hydraulics hisses as it opens.

Shiro is sitting at the desk, eyes on the orange screened tablet as he reviews incoming materials and recent repair updates for the ATLAS. He stops for a moment to glance up.

“Griffin welcome.” No glares, that’s a good sign.

“Captain, I have the MFE reports you wanted.” He wishes he can just set the paperworks down and be on his way, but he knows better than that.

“Please take a seat, I’m almost done with these and then I’ll review yours.” Shiro is much too good of a leader, he wants to actually review and talk these things over with each departments leader since he's taken over ATLAS as captain.

The brunet nods and takes a seat, sliding the chair a little farther from the desk so he can sit comfortably. A few minutes pass and James’ resists the urge to pull out his phone. Only recently have they restore worldwide communicates within the states.

“Thank you for waiting,” He holds out his hand, waiting to James to pass his tablet over, which he does.

Shiro flickers between the screens, skimming the information.

“How are the new cadets coming along?”

“Some are still having difficulty adjusting to the control, but the simulators are helping with that, others can’t adjust to the speed so we’ve started some drills to help ease the sickness after.” He reports.

The captain hums in understanding and continues through the reports.

“You...you trained with Adam while you were learning how to fly the MFE’s, right?” The question hits James from the left field and he’s confused.

“Yeah-- I did, he was one of the best mentor’s anyone could have asks for.” There’s no need to lie, but why is he bringing him up now?

“How was he...before he died?”

The zone they’re both slowly trudging into makes James uncomfortable, but he can’t just run away, Shiro could pull rank and he’s done. “He...he missed you, but that didn’t stop him from doing everything he could for Earth.”

Another hum and Shiro lays the tablet onto the desk, intertwining his fingers, eyebrows furrowed deep in thought. Did Shiro still love Adam or was he over him? It’s been months from his discovery, but years since their break up. The devil on his shoulder grips onto him. He knows that during that time and the time he’s disappeared there was something special in the way both Keith and Shiro look at one another. That only becomes all more evident from the pairs interactions in the earlier months.  If this man has feelings for Keith. It’s over there’s no way he can win Keith over.

“Permission to speak, Sir?” His heart hammers in his chest.

“Permission granted.”

“Do you….love Keith?” he lays to out like a fire. Wild and uncontrollable, he’s been unable to run away from this since he first met Keith. He won’t let Shiro run from this either.

Shiro freezes, his shoulder hackle in surprise and he stares anywhere but James.

“I don’t see how this pertains to anything, Griffin.” He's trying to stay composed, but James hit a soft spot and he won’t let go that easily.

“You asked about Adam so I get to ask about Keith,” James hisses out. His manners are out the door, he’s upset cause he needs confirmation. The words are already in the air. He already knows the answer but he needs to hear it straight from Shiro’s mouth.

“James.” The other responds a clear warning in his voice.

“Shiro.” he jerks his chin forward in challenge.

A knock breaks the tension like a twig. Loud and sudden and they’re both reeling back from their confrontation.

The door hisses open right after. “Sir, some of the Paladin’s have started waking up,” he huffs out, probably running from the other side of the base to here.

“Which ones?”

“All but the Black Paladin are showing signs of waking up,” the officer says, his hand moves up to tap on the com unit.

James thinks bitterly that Shiro is saved by the non-existent bell as he stands and starts to the door. For a brief moment he thinks he won’t get his answer that James will be left with his own mind games and his unrequited crush he thought he got over years ago.

“Yes.” Shiro spares him no glance as he follows the officer that interrupts them. Finally heading to see his friends who’ve been in comas for the past three months.

It leaves James numb. He shouldn't ask questions he’s not prepared to hear.

**Author's Note:**

> A lot of you guys seemed interested in a part two, so here it is, with all that Jaith content from season 7 I got a few ideas 
> 
> There will be a part three!! A battle royal for Keith's heart?? Who will win, Space bf or Earth bf???
> 
> Thank you for so much support on the first part to this and I hope you guys enjoy the second part all the same <3
> 
> If you'd like you can also check out my other fic: Isolation which is Aliens(1986) Au for voltron, next chapter for that should be up soon, editing is a pain 
> 
> pls bare any mistakes cause I dished this out all at once and checked what I could for mistakes


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